Couples therapy

Do we have to be in crisis to come?

No. Plenty of couples come because the distance is quiet rather than loud. The conversations got shorter, the same argument runs on a loop, or one of you has been holding something back to keep the peace.

Coming early is easier than coming late. You do not have to wait until it is bad enough to justify the appointment.

Will you take sides?

No. I am direct with both of you, which some people find is the first time anyone has been. Two things are usually true at once in a relationship: you are each doing what makes sense from where you are standing, and the pattern between you is still hurting you both.

My job is to make that pattern visible so you can work on it together instead of on each other.

What do we actually practise?

How to raise something difficult without an ambush. How to listen when you already know what you want to say. How to notice the moment you have flooded, take a break on purpose, and come back rather than disappear.

We set goals together that are specific and achievable, and we check them. Small changes you both keep beat big promises neither of you can hold.

Common reasons couples reach out

• The same argument, over and over, with a different subject each time
• One partner deployed, worked shifts, or was away, and coming home changed the rhythm
• Parenting decisions that turn into loyalty tests
• Trust that needs rebuilding, slowly and on purpose

Ready when you are.

Therapy starts with a conversation. Send a short message and tell me what is going on, in your own words. We meet in person in Omaha, and online across Nebraska and Rhode Island.